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Schizzla Gambrowski (not real names tho’) is more than a friend to me. We’ve grown up ever since childhood and I’ve watched him together with yours sincerely grow into a young, strong, godly, mature macho man what he commonly abbreviates to YSGMMM. While I hold nothing against him on his views shared with me over the weekend, I sort of drew a correlation between the truth and the false identities we all are trying to fit into.



It has now become a norm for everyone to have an accent, blackberry has now become a club on its own, the i phone users now consider themselves living in another world, the galaxy tab users now have a different clique of social networks all thanks to the latest iGadgets in their possession. Now this is another topic for a different weather but one thing I’ve noticed is that iGadgets with bible apps in them have also taken folks far away from God than ever. How can someone be divided in church. Divided in attention, how can you be asked to open a chapter in the Old Testament and on the other page of the iGadget, you’re reading CNN finance! How? Remember—God is a jealous God.

Or is it blackberry pingers unionism? The ease at which mobile phones especially blackberry phones in particular vibrate in church when church is in session usurping the spiritual harmony therein leaves me wondering if we are actually deceiving God or ourselves. During worship? Intercessory prayer, praise, sermon nko? Aaaabegi! Make we no dey form Christians jare, na just to make sure we go ‘schurchi! How dem go dey preach repent and U dey set P’ inside the same church when the sermon coming out from the lips of an anointed vessel has reached the loudest decibel! How?

What else, opps sorri, Im almost diverting from my main course.-The marriage issue as it relates to brothers. Back to what my bro, Schizzla said, he made mention of the fact that he cannot just bump into some ‘senorita all because she looks good or rather presentable. Hmm I wonder o; all guys are guilty of this, paying excess attention to the container rather than the contents, viewing carelessly and almost, if not getting caught. How do you mean? I enquired further.

Hear him “Girls of these days just want an already made man.yeah? yay or nay? , ok second one, ladies these days are just for one thing, the ‘Benjamin’s’ they just want to ‘flex flex flex ! Without even caring to know about what you do for a living.’ Changing my countenance facially, I objected to that line of thought and he gave some reals examples all in a bid to buy me. Well in d end, I succumb**! #don’t tell anyone I did o!

Truth is, everyman has to work out his salvation be it in terms of spiritual renewal and rebirth , financial, personal stability, career, business  or otherwise. It’s a journey where we’d have to walk alone until a partner comes along to be of HELP. Be that as it may, I am yet to understand why all them ladies would prefer to be waiting for the already made man when they can put a stake in his future by being part of his story! Remember you can only repaint an already made house, breaking it and rebuilding it to ya taste will time, time, perseverance, patience and energy. You will also need skilled workmen to help you with the finishings.

Let’s apply this little example to a relationship. You meet a nice, good looking brother, earns in huge numerical digits, his wallet and account numbers are fatter than the cows in pharaoh’s dreams. He’s got a nice apartment, tastefully furnished, sleek ride’ and those pedigree you once craved for. What next? But there’s a shocker. Dude’s a drug user, flirts at the slightest possible opportunity, porn addict and an uncultured verbal bomber. What can you lay hold of as your own in his life nothing! Of course! Serious. Even when and while you may last in his life, your impact may never be felt like if you were with him way back.

Lemme’ h’ask a question, tell me, how do you start making him to unlearn those habits? Tough one yeah?. But please do remember, that in trying to help him unlearn those unwanted traits, please be careful not to be caught up in your fantasy, don’t get drowned while trying to save a soul, don’t die same way Samson died with the philistines!

Sometimes the people we claim to love abandons us when we need them the most, sometimes out of careless distractions, we missed the opportunity God has placed for us  right on time for , every proclamation of love has to be tested and that thin line marks either  fear, failure or future. But on a serious note let’s say 54% of guys and 35% girls found a would-have-been partner on campus. But because when love took them to the waters they could not bend a lil to take the waters in and see the future, they fell to the floor. As a point, ever wondered why a relationship which started on the remedial level in the University would end up broken either in Final year or in fifth year? Why? Cos love took em to the waters but they couldn’t hold.

Remember Gideon and his 300 men, what happened? Were they not in their thousands until God spoke to him “take them to the waters”. Are you ready to be taken? To be taken by love to the waters? Can you adapt, will you nag, compromise, correct carefully, compliment or complicate?

Many sisters are out there being single cos they have been leaving in fantasy Island not too far from Real Life Villa.” They have too much vices than virtues.


What else? After a lady has been successfully captivated by a man’s carriage, looks and charisma, the man also should know this .

“A man can only occupy a woman’s attention with the substance and action he produces after the hype, buzz, effizi, of his looks. It then becomes a matter worthy of great attention when a man truly fights and contends for his place in the heart of his choosen lady, who has finally been attracted to him, by and large he has already set himself on a battle either to conquer or be conquered. A man becomes more attractive when he has ginger’, when he is ambitious, hardworking, smart, creative,  and provides his woman with truth, value,, love , security, clothes her with respect, adorns her with her needs, earn her wants and worth. Ambition, goals targeted, age old values of being the provider and not the provided for, is now the new sexy. Looks has been done with. Objections anyone?

Yeah brothers can’t seem to cope these days cos there’s a big mismatch between the 8am lady, and the 11pm woman. Yea, the media has made left us  awash with so many pictures of what a good looking sister, girl, lady should look like. Eye lashes, breastpads, cleavage whatever, waist pads! Hip liners etc have left many brothers stranded in many relationships. They are there, hooked to the bait that got them into where they are now and yeah? They’ve been caught, what they saw was not what they got,. Faces have been turned to palettes; bags have literarily turned to museums, yeah? fashion antiquities and old relics from the medieval to this current era can be found! in those bags!

We are attracted to the 8am, office, Monday morning sister, but cannot seem to decipher the irony of the 11pm sleeping time kind of woman; we are not ready to face realities any time soon. We are more into the undue expectations society, media hype has played on us and now we are our own directors, directing how we act out, and script out our entire life.

RED Alert! Attitudes Guys Can’t Stand


Constant bickering


Uncontrolled tempers

Loose Lips… like they say.. sink ships

The **FBI** attitude

Bad cook


Emotional Insecurity.

Lest I Forget

Over my little stay on mother earth, I’ve watched folks neglect discipline and they call itself esteem, endorsed perversion and called it alternative lifestyle, ridiculed time honored values, ethics and traditions of our society and we then have choosen to call it enlightenment. For how long shall we continue like this?

Last Word?

So ladies if the brothers ain’t coming, you might as well go ahead, In Madeas Voice** go ahead and position ya self, abi? Don’t tell me u wanna remain single till rapture comes. But on the safe side, get ya hands to work, roll up ya sleeves, a brother is somewhere watching,  It’s time to help a bro, be the eyes when he can’t see.

C h e e r s!